Ok so I think I may be quitting this. I am really not enjoying this challenge.... I am ok with the the restrictions, kinda. In terms of having huge cravings and really just wanting a bowl of ice cream, I am totally fine. I am annoyed that it is Friday and we are about to watch a movie and I can't have a glass of wine, but not tormented by it. But this challenge/experiment whatever you want to call it has taken an unexpected spiritual and emotional turn. It has been weighing heavy on me I really just can't shake how against this diet/lifestyle, whatever, I have suddenly become. I really don't think we were meant to live/eat this way..... this restrictive, and it is really upsetting me. So continuing for the next 18 days seems a bit pointless to me. I also don't like how obsessed I am becoming with what I eat..... I was really freaking out this morning thinking about each meal, each snack I shouldn't be eating, putting down a piece of fruit and eating nuts or eggs because they said so (really..... I don't think that is good for the waist line....), I have also never been so bloated and gassy before in my life... TMI but for real, its gross. Energy is not soaring like promised (yes I know I was sick yesterday...) and I think I am starting to gain weight back.... I have more thoughts but I think I need to process a bit more before I share them.
So this is where I am at. I wanted to try this as an experiment and see how my body feels. I am surprised by how not good I feel and how emotional/spiritual this has become. I was not expecting that to be my struggle.... Tomorrow is my scheduled cheat meal at the staff "Christmas" party so I have a feeling I will just give up after that. But I will continue the reflecting and see what happens. Prayers and comments please??
Food: Same as everyday but I made a huge batch of coconut curry cabbage and had that at lunch and dinner as my veggie :) Yumm!
3 comments:
I'm sorry to hear it has taken this turn for you. I think an important thing to remember though is that even the people who created Whole30 don't *live* this way. (One of their tweets from Mexico about enjoying corn tortillas caused a huge uproar, and they were like, "Back off! It's not Whole365!") It really is meant to be a 30-day experiment. Francis and I enjoyed our Whole30, but basically live by the 80/20 principle and enjoy our wings and nachos when we go out. :) But if it's not for you, it's not for you. I enjoy the freedom of not obsessing about what I can/can't eat when I'm on one of these plans, and I find meal-planning much simpler. But if it's doing the opposite for you, call it quits. No point in stressing about food!
Oh honey...I'm impressed with your progress, no matter where you quit. I've been checking in on your blog now and then and I'm blown away! I don't think I could survive on a whole30, even if it is just for a month?! Good for you for taking on the challenge, and for overall putting your health and fitness on your priority list. I'm beyond impressed by your determination! If this is wearing on you, I think there is no shame in going back to the "already ridiculously healthy" way you were eating before!
Shan
I quit Shan! I am back to my "already ridiculously healthy" eating :) That made me laugh! Basically I found it was becoming a bit of a form of idolatry.... it was totally messing with my head! But lots of good came from it so I am still glad I got to try it. I am still processing some thoughts/trying to find the time to sit down and try explain it all. But I am happy, eating well, not diving into a plate of cookies like I thought I would and actually feeling great!
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